WebKittyn Warbles

I couldn't let the day go by without writing something. Six years ago yesterday Darkstar brought home what would become my best friend and confidante and I need to wish him a Happy Tempiversary!

Six years ago Darkstar was at work and it was raining like crazy. For some reason he discovered some cats drowning in a drainage ditch outside of his job. The mother rescued one kitten and took off, leaving two stuck. He managed to save them both and they spent the rest of the day with him at work in a box with warm blankets and food he sent the stock guy out to get.

One was black and white and looked like my first cat Claude and the other was grey and white. The black and white was healthy and ready to rock, when he brought them home I took her out of the box and ZING, she was off and running and hiding behind the fridge. The grey guy was in bad shape. He had been stuck under the fence in the ditch and was sliced open on his side, had a deep gash on his head and had been deprived of oxygen for a few while he was stuck.

Luckily for us we knew good people who love cats, Bob immediately rose to the occasion and offered to take one of the kittens. This was a good thing, we knew whichever one we picked would have a safe and loving home.

I initially wanted to keep the girl because she looked like Claude but Darkstar convinced me to keep the boy and I agreed. I was home all day, I could take care of the little guy.

They were young, they were estimated to be about 5 weeks old and ours was in really dire shape. We immediately moved the mattress off of the guest bed and stuck it in the middle of the living room and that's where I slept for the next three months.

He needed to be bottle-fed. He needed three different medications two and three times a day. He made himself a home inside a cat condo we had and he would teeter out to use the little litterbox we had there and he would topple over in pain, breaking my heart with every step.. I would hold him and purr into his fur and lick his head like I thought a mother cat would do. Claudie was amazing, he immediately took to the little guy and would lick him and lay by him.

Slowly he began to heal and eventually he was well enough to wander around the living room. He found a hidey spot under and when he poked his head out he looked like a rat so he was named Templeton the Rat Cat after Paul Lynde's Templeton from Charlotte's Web. His head had a permanent tilt to one side the vet said was from being deprived of oxygen. We were told he would "never jump" and "never be graceful."

Seven months later Claudie died and I thought my world was ending. My first cat, my first love and my best friend of 10 years. I had never lost a pet that was truly mine and I wasn't prepared for the severity of the loss and what it did to me. I'm not sure I would have made it through without Tempy, I spent a lot of time crying on soft grey fur. He would walk around and look at the places Claude used to sleep and he would start yowling for him which would immediately send me into hysterics. We got each other through that time.

In the six years I've had Tempy he's been there for the loss of Claude and The Great Catsby. He was there for me when my father got sick. He got me through 8 weeks in the hospital looking at his pictures and wanting to go home to my Tempy. He got me through my father's death and continues to do so when I feel the tears coming on. He loves me like no one else and doesn't care when his fur gets soaked, I think he understands.

Six years later the vet was wrong. He jumps like a pro, he's graceful as any cat and he loves being up high. His head still tilts but that only makes him cuter. He's spoiled rotten and the others all know he is the Alpha in the house. He knows all my secrets, has seen me at my best and my worst, never judges me and doesn't care if I'm sitting next to him throwing my brains up.

Thank you for six years of being my cat, Templeton. Here's to the next six and the next after that!

Tempy when he first came to us, sick and tiny:


Tempy and Claude, the original "Evils":


Tempy today. Fat, happy and loved:

I can't sleep so here I am. I have to be up early for the blood tests (every test known to mankind, I'm going to be drained of blood) but I can't sleep. I'm not freaking out but there's definitely some nervous action going on.

I'm trying to force as much water down my gut as I can, there's still time to pee in that jug. You healthy types don't get it, part of the determination of kidney function is how much pee there is. Never in my life did I think I'd ever be concerned over how much I was or wasn't peeing but here we are.

Then I have to wait almost three weeks for the results, that's a pain in the ass. Ugh. If he tries to tell me I need to go back on dialysis we're going to brawl right there in his office. Seriously.

Nerves aside, things aren't bad. A few attacks from the evil kidneys this week but I toughed it out and didn't let them mess with my head. I've been back in touch with a friend I never should have let go of in the first place and that's been a big smile source the past few days. I've got an overload of positives lately and I'm doing my damndest to let them lead the way.

So this is a short one, I'm feeling kind of dizzy and out of it so I'm going to hit the jug one more time and try and rest a bit.

See you all post blood work tomorrow...

So I was skimming something earlier and I had to laugh my ass off at it.

Most of my regular readers know exactly who the "White Whale of Pa." is and why I absolutely cannot stand the bitch. How everything about this chick makes my skin crawl from her disgusting face to her pompous superior attitude to her one-time pathetic attempt at trying to lay down a set of rules for life I was supposed to follow if I wanted to be friends with her 'man.' Friends. I don't follow rules given to me by insecure obese women in 'open' marriages who like to take truth and twist it. She made a big scene a year or so ago, left a long and utterly ludicrous letter to me on her LJ, the whole thing was comical. Little slutbag has her online boy toy from the other side of the country whom she loves along with her husband who was at one time a good friend. Once it became clear that her plan was to have her cake and eat it too and lay the smack down on a FRIENDSHIP I quickly got out. Took the time to reply to skanky and haven't spoken to him since. Stupid bitch made me lose a friend I cared for but I suppose I should thank her in the long run for showing me that my friend was a spineless man-pet who likes being told what to do and when to do it and how to bark.

All this time later and she's still going on about "some stuff came up which shook my security in our relationship--hell, in my decision-making ability as a whole--from which I'm still recovering given that I've always, without fail, been a ridiculously secure person." OVER A YEAR LATER!!! Honey, it wasn't a big deal. You took a friendship and twisted it, you tried to dictate laws and rules, you were acting like the Princess Bitch and your husband was reaching out to a friend, nothing more. Funny how those who feel the need to tell the world how secure they are are really the least secure and need to say it so maybe they'll believe it. You're still going on about that??

Do I miss the friend? I did for a while but who wants a friend who has to ask permission to talk to you and then runs back and shares every word YOU said (not what they said) with the lunatic? Not this chick. Do I miss him now? Nope. I'm an adult, I prefer to live my life within the laws of society on my terms and I don't have a lot of respect for people who have to have permission to do or say anything. My ex tried to tell me not to talk to certain friends and instead of going forth with wedding plans I walked out. At least I can say I think for myself, control my own choices and no one is going to lay down laws for my day to day.

So why does she feel the need to open her blow-hole and spew this shit once more? Get the hell over it. You got what you wanted, you bullied your way into making sure your husband lost WD and the friends he had made in ImmVille along with the respect of her peers. You put him back in your cage where he may only speak to those you deem fit (which translates to anyone she feels is below her, if she can feel smug and superior it's all good so I guess that was a compliment to me). Stop already, please. Stop acting like I met up with your man at the freaken' hotel and did anything, this was an online friendship and there is no reason for you to bring it up now and claim to STILL be 'wounded" unless you're looking once again for attention or affirmation or validation. Maybe it's the mental issues she loves to brag about like some noble suffering victim of life.

In any case, I have no idea why she felt the need to do this and why she's still hanging on to something that was never there over a year ago. Continue on in your weird little version of what a marriage is and stop writing about me even in vague references. You're even more damaged than I thought you were if you're still bothered by nothing and claiming you were right about nothing. Did it feel good to be right in your eyes and crack that leash on him? Did you think you accomplished anything because I was the one who said this shit is crazy and decided I wanted nothing to do with my friend because he was married to an insecure head case with a God complex?

Enough already. Don't you have a husband to get back to walking or a boy toy on the west coast to proclaim your love for? Leave me out of it, my life is stable and on an upswing and I have nothing to do with any of you so shush and shoo!

This is why we hang out with males. Males don't do shit like this. Woman are batshit.

Such a nasty title, I'm sorry if you're here under false pretenses but I had to do it!!

I've got a big set of bloodwork on Friday, real important. I haven't had tests like this run on me in three years since they took me off the filtering process that is hell dialysis. I'm a little nervous but that's to be expected, I won't find out the results of the tests until July 18th so the waiting is going to suck but I'm pretty sure the results won't be bad. I mean, I have end stage kidney failure so they're going to suck no matter what but I don't think they'll be any worse. I feel better than I have in three years so I have to assume the for the moment, my kidneys are at peace with me.

The most important part of these tests is the GFR (glomerular filtration rate). This is the numeric determination of how much kidney function you have. The be-all and end-all of tests, you can't argue a GFR test. It's a mix of assorted blood levels, urine levels, age, race, gender, etc.

For the curious, it's laid out really well right here.

Last time I took the test I was determined to be at 20% kidney function. That's the bottom of stage 4 kidney disease, 15% starts stage 5 which is the critical permanent dialysis until you get a transplant stage. I was damn close but not that bad. Below 10% and you're pretty much either living on dialysis or dead.

Back in January they did a half-assed GFR test without all the components and determined I was at 19%. This worked for me, a 1% loss in three years means I'm doing something right (it's the weed, I tell you it's the medical marijuana) but without the urine it's not a true count.

This one on Friday is a true count. Here comes the fun part.

I have to "collect" my pee for 24 hours. I get to keep it in the fridge next to the milk and carry it with me Friday to the lab for the bloodwork. Woohoo.

Problem is, the pee container was OBVIOUSLY not designed with the female anatomy in mind. Contrary to what Darkstar thinks, women can not aim their pee (or if they can it's a skill I lack). Were I a male it would be no problem to use this monstrosity but as a woman with woman-parts, I can't help but crack up every time I look at this and wonder what the hell they were thinking....

I took a few pictures of this horrible pee vessel, nothing like sharing the pee humour. I put the thing next to Sir Edmund so you can get an idea of how big it is (who the hell could possibly pee that much in 24 hours????? Even when my kidneys DID work I couldn't come close to filling this bad boy) and because not everyone puts a pic of a pee jug next to a cute cat.

Come, laugh with me. Think of me on Friday when I end up peeing all over my hands or peeing in a plastic cup and pouring it in this stupid jug and putting it in the fridge next to lunch.

(I just realised I'm going to get a gabillion hits off people searching freaky porn with that title but screw it).

Picture time:

No.
Yes.
Yes.

Yes.
No.
Yes.

Yes.
Yes.
Yes.