WebKittyn Warbles
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Don’t Even Try
I really need to stop trying to figure it all out. It's never going to make sense and that's fine. Much greater minds than mine have tried to figure it all out and failed, I'm not asking anymore.
After a particularly harsh week filled to capacity with lies, drama, horseshit to the eyebrows and crude realisations about people I once placed trust in I have absolutely no explanation for the up I've been riding for the past 3 days. None. It shouldn't be there.
This isn't just the typical good mood either, it's the internal peace and empowerment sort of good. But why is it there? It's also damn close to a full moon. Hrm.
So, yah. Hard to pin into words. Empowered. Confident. Strong. Intuitive, sensors on full. Calm. Someone who knows me well enough to read my moods caught it yesterday, got me on icq and told me he hadn't seen me like this in a long time. In control, in command, in the zone. Does it carry over to others? No clue. Do they see it/feel it/sense it? No clue. Am I nuts? No clue.
I've even been sociable, 3 messengers on at once and talking to people! Of course I trust no one after this week but I'm definitely enjoying the discovering of new people.
I'm not knocking it, either. I don't need to know the source, I'm enjoying the ride.
Do I wonder what the people I'm chatting to think? Of course.
Everything seems to be clicking, everything seems to be in place and everything seems to be positive. Karma works in quick and wondrous ways, I suppose.
The fact that it's purrfect outside doesn't hurt either. It's grey and windy and 57 degrees, it's like being gifted with a second early Fall. It's just the right climate for the meeting of mind and body, to ride the synchronicity.
It's times like this when you run into 1 of the 10 people, it's that rare. I've found 2 so far. To find the third after a week like this....
Look around,
come to me.
I have no answers
but know where I wanna be..
Yah okay. So I'm paranoid, obsessive, stubborn, opinionated, manic to a point, intellectually snooty, stuck in 80's music, smoke too much weed, have strange ideas about skittles and sex, care way too much about muds and mudders, eat all the wrong food and drink way too much red dew and tend to think to much and over-analyse the world. All acknowledged, Captain. Would I change any of them if I could? Hell no.
I am, simply, what I always was. Heatherlyn. Just a little more aware.
Wherever it comes from, thank you.
<-- Steal me!
