WebKittyn Warbles

This is a really tough week for me.

I don't need to go into how tough this first Father's Day is. Last year I was too sick to go see my dad but he was doing better so I bought him and my mother lunch from Red Lobster and they ate at the Center. And I thought that was depressing.

This year it's double whammy year, doesn't it just figure that when you need it the least it hits?

My mother's birthday is June 21st and every seven years her birthday happens to fall on Father's Day. Yah, that would be this year. Joy. She'll be 70.

My dad didn't leave the house much towards the end, it was that hard for him to breathe. However, my mother had made him promise that on Father's Day / her birthday they would go out to brunch.

Needless to say, it's pretty bad around here. I'm doing the best I can to keep my own head above water and trying to keep her as okay as possible but I'm fighting a losing battle.

Tonight's she's got a friend's graduation to go to and a big party for this person on Saturday so it's something. I have no idea how the rest of it's going to go.

She took the 23rd off from work as well, it's five months to the day since he died and too close to her birthday for her to be at work.

I want the week to be over. I want to blink my eyes and be done with all of the week and have it be the 24th. I want to be past that first Father's Day and I think I can mentally prepare myself in seven years for the next double whammy.

Golf is on, the Open is on. I would have been spending as much time as possible watching every second of it with my dad and it's both comforting and really sad at the same time. I miss him so much still. It's been five months and it hasn't lessened at all.

I'm not drowning in sad though, as much as it may sound like it. I take comfort in quite a few things and am appreciative of all the little things that manage to pull my thoughts away for a few minutes and maybe even make me smile.

I just want this first Father's Day over.

Let's go, Tiger. Win this one for Chuckie.